1. This is the entire theme of my memoir. People can’t believe everything that happened and yet it is the right attitude that gets you through. Hoarding unforgiveness or playing the martyr get you nowhere but deeper in depression.

  2. Self-pity is the worst kind of favor that we can do ourselves, Karen. If we don’t believe in our abilities, how will we expect the rest of the world to?

    I’ve always avoided the victim mentality. One way that I do this is to laugh at the situation and put a distance between it and myself. Difficult at times but at least I have some control over my actions.
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  3. Elizabeth O.

    Self pity will never get you anywhere other than depression. You’ll end up not doing anything good for yourself because you keep sulking. This is definitely one of the things we have to rid of in order to be happy.

  4. Self pity is such a waste of time. Say thank-you for the opportunities that have come your way and grasp them with both hands. Most of them probably look like hard work. Hard work can only make you stronger. Be thankful that you have a brain in your head and the breath in your body.

  5. Sadly many people don’t awaken to excitement about a brand new day. They are inspired & look forward to all the inspirational & motivational posts you see all over social media.I am blessed with a promising view of every day.

  6. Lisa Bristol

    I try to go to sleep every night thinking of all the blessings i have. It is important to remind ourselves of all the good things we have.

  7. This is so relevant when selling. Feeling sorry for yourself when you lose a deal is a waste of time and effort. “Onwards and upwards” is my motto to combat self pity!

  8. This is often called the “victim” type of personality, where they are at the whim of the world. Things happen “to” them and they feel “woe-is-me” because of it. To truly empower ourselves, is to take responsibility for all our actions and all the circumstances we find ourselves in. Look at life as opportunity and possibility, rather than dread for a new day. We do have a choice in how we are in our lives. We create and re-create them each moment of each day!
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  9. So many people engage themselves in self-pity and as much as you try to raise them up you just can’t.

    I have given up trying to make everyone happy and made peace with the idea that it’s not my job to do so. All that I do is to make sure I am happy and then it’s just contagious because people around me become happier too.

    Such a great and important message, Karen, I’m glad you’re raising awareness.
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  10. I think everyone at one time or another has slipped into the “victim” mode. It’s so tiring to be around someone who is constantly there, I can’t imagine living a life that way. But, with that being said, when we do slip, and it’s usually during a time of overwhelm, learning what works for you to turn it around, and practicing that will help change your habit of slipping into that mindset.
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  11. From an early age (I can remember this as a child) I always looked at other people and said “I’m happy I don’t have their problems”. I think some of that outlook came from having a friend with childhood leukemia and how she bore herself through the constant treatments, blood draws, and so forth. I can feel sorry for myself when I am in pain from a couple of physical issues I have – otherwise, I try hard to veer away from self pity.
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